Yojimbo's Movie Review of The Transporter

Rating of
1/4

The Transporter

"The Transporter" by Yojimbo
Yojimbo - wrote on 07/06/12

Many of my friends scored this one highly on here, and Luc Besson penned the script so I thought I'd give it a go. It starts well with a cool Jason Statham ferrying Guy Ritchie style bumbling crooks in a high octane chase from a bank robbery. But soonafter Statham struggles with his ill-written cardboard cut-out of a character in a script that despite it's relocation to picturesque France, could be a Van Damme or a Seagal. In fact, the European locations made it feel like a throwback to Roger Moore's Bond. Not only that, but a BAD Roger Moore Bond. The dumb, cliche riddled and episodic script isn't even saved by the frankly lame action sequences; the scene when Statham is oiled up fighting multiple bad guys on bicycle pedals is something Jackie Chan might've gotten away with, but done without humour it looks absolutely absurd. Add to this the painfully bad euro hip-pop soundtrack, and there's only one word for it...eurotrash.

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