"300" by Yojimbo
Yojimbo - wrote on 09/12/12
When the corrupt oracles rule that Sparta should not be defended against the oncoming Persian army, King Leonidas leads an army of 300 warriors to defend their lands. In other words a dozen male strippers hack away in slow motion at a collection of CGI circus freaks and a giant drag queen for two solid hours. And that's it. Plot development? Nope. Characterisation? Nada. Meaningful dialogue? Zip. If anything, 300 is like a historical Ultraviolet, except instead of plastic sci fi cliches spouting techno-gibberish it just resembles a collection of Bill and Ted's album covers brought to life linked by a load of macho posturing in cod Olde Worlde speak. It's an adaptation of Frank Miller's graphic novel so there is some nice imagery and well framed shots in deference to his vision, but I don't think history will look kindly on this film as it's basically just cinema reduced to the level of an empty, homo-erotic cartoon.