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OK Rick's Movie Reviews (4)

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2/4
1.5/4
2/4
1/4

 

300 
300 .. or so
2/4 stars

Dear Reader,

(I don't really remember a lot of this film, but I'll do my best.) If you love delicious, action slacked (slow motion), grade A, un-homogenized, pure, "sexy" violence, you might love this film. As for those of us who go to the movies for the story ... I don't remember there being one. All I remember is that a bunch of jocks wanted to chuck a javelin at the gay dude, who probably has a mean rating of 9.98 on vampirefreaks.com, and then the jocks got impaled by a bunch of fancy lawn darts, which I had previously thought were illegal. That might not be an accurate recount of the movie. Let me try again. It was basically like Braveheart, yeah, only on steroids, meth, X, horse, 'shrooms, crank, blow, huff, windowpane, amps, pot (for the slow motion effects) and it was without a point. It was Troy with better cinematography and a tinge less painful to watch. So, in the end, I guess if you like abs, blood and guts and good ol' fashioned killin', including new, state-of-the-art baby killin', you have to see this film. If you don't, I would recommend that you not forget to take your Metamucil and/or Centrum Silver, put your dentures in a nice Efferdent bath and sit this one out.

ME


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