Yojimbo's Movie Reviews (2062)

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Superman Returns 
"Superman Returns" by Yojimbo
1.5/4 stars

Lois Lane in peril! Oh, no...but wait! Superman appears at the last minute and saves her! But dastardly Lex Luther plots an evil scheme...superman blows out some fires and flies around catching falling signs/foiling bank robberys. But wait! Lex has kryptonite and defeats Supes. But Lois saves him and he returns to save the day! Hoorah! Any of this sounding familiar...? The Superman franchise has been so ubiquitous since the original films that EVERYTHING has been done. There is not ONE original idea on display here...even the one interesting plot twist is telegraphed a few minutes before it happens. The cast are bland and characterless (Routh seems to be doing a half-arsed impersonation of Christopher Reeve during the entire film) and Spacey lacks the larger than life charisma that Hackman brought to the role. And it's FAR too long. I'm going to score it higher than X-Men 3 as it is technically a better film. But I'd much rather sit through that again than rewatch this. It may be have been crap, but at least it wasn't BORING...

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